I rarely post anything about my daughter unless it’s that we spent the day together out and yes today we did . 🙂anyways my daughter has been dating a guy now going on 5 yrs in Oct he is 7 yes older so almost 30 per say but in most cases acts like he is 18 or younger my daughter is way more mature then him at 22 and this relationship is so one sided always been about him and and he is a gamer so stays up all night playing video games works but only part time could of landed a full time position but has lost his chances by not giving .. showing enough effort to be the right person for it. Sadly he has no motivation so your thinking why is she with him well we all wonder the same thing her family friends . We did not realize all this at the time seemed like a super nice person but now seeing he isn’t well he is not a bad person but he is not a happy person due to his own fault and she is not happy but he plays poor me and she gets mad for a bit but then feels bad and stays with him … we have all been so nice to him helped him but sadly he is not going anywhere they tried living together it lasted barely a year so now he is living with his mom. not saving complains. constantly about everything you cant give him advice he does not take it it’s his way or no way can’t compromise ,and when he is at our house for several day he sets off this vibe a dark cloud over me and she has felt it too yes I believe in vibes.. karma when he leave it lifts yes I instantly can feel the relieve ,I cannot take seeing her get miserable but then play nice to him and no matter what we say she stays with him . She says she isn’t as attracted to him like she was and wished it would fade out instead it just keeps going this way they work together so this doesn’t help and now I’m finding that even what I say doesn’t matter as a mother to daughter talk she stays with him . I’m so frusturated with all this and I’m ready to cut the ties myself from befriending him on Facebook … buying him things for holidays I just realize she isn’t going to end this with anyone’s input . why I ask ? She is so much better then this deserves so much more I can’t understand . All I know is I tried being nice to him for her sake but cannot anymore too much stress , so I’m going to stop asking about him if she as an issue with him I will not give feed back I’m washing my hands from this . Anyone have any advice ? I would gladly take it. I’m thinking more negative things I say she stays with him . Is this going to sadly be her life lesson to deal with him and regret this someday . I hope not . What to do ….anyone ?
I have been trying to bring in the good energy be more positive instead it’s seeming to go the opposite ..things are breaking and going wrong all around me and it’s making me unhappy. , what am I doing wrong ? Am I not trying enough to bring the good energy in? I’ve never been a high believer in this but I thought I would try it. Should I just be who I am think the way I always have because honestly I think I was less exhauste when I just letting things go the way they will I seemed more happier with thinking and living one day at a time and taking things has they come then looking through roes color glasses . I’ve always have believed that somethings you just cant change no matter how positive you are . In some case yes but but not all the time I’ have always lived I guess in the middle . So I guess I need to stay that person. Especially this yr with all the changes I need to just focus on getting use to the changes is that a bad thing. It’s been a rough day and Im sick of being who I’m not . I’m sorry my sister in law said I should try this good energy positive thing I don’t know how it’s working for her it seems more like she avoids things and people and shelters herself in her home with her family and that’s it and doesn’t want to hear or read about anything bad … is that such a good idea ? I’m so confused. Any advice any one I guess what’s good for som isn’t for others.
So interesting this horoscope today ….okay I do feel emotional but hmm this I don’t know …. So if you read my last post you will understand. A very wise blogging friend gave me some good advice and I think oh I know I will use it . Thanks friend.
In my post last night I had mentioned I had a conversation with my son. and I had said it didn’t go as well as planned well I have decided my son is a teenager and definitely does not or is in defiance, does not have a clue about life okay yes he is 16 maybe very social has a lot of drive… focus but maturity not. Okay yes we have all been 16 and we lived in our own worlds and we thought life was so great and fun and we thought we knew everything and our parents we looked at them like they where aliens ….well that was the look I did towards my son. Nothing I said clicked nothing I said was right ,he contradicted himself through out the conversation. I was dumbfounded and knew our talk was going in circles and I didn’t know who was chasing who. I stopped talking just let it go and he went in his room . I pondered the thought over and over in my head the one thing he said that kept slapping me in the face was I qoute “You ask so much of me” “your always telling me to get a better job” it’s always about money I need to concentrate on school and sports ,okay one his father and I only ask for respect when he walks into the house and good grades . and yes we want him to do good with his sports and get into a good college so he can run for them and he is so good at it but its hard to take him after he gets so tired he is exhausting after because he is ugly that I cannot take.who doesn’t want that and we only say things about his job because he his always complaining about money and his father and I feel he wants to hang out with his friends every night and eat out in which case he contradicted himself when he said we do not do that as much now and I only need enough money for gas. yeah okay that’s why when this weeks Spring vacation is here he will be going out and why should we have to pay for that when we pay for everything else and he is able to work. hmm is he thinking of other parents…what is it with these kids and their drama they do not have a clue about life I know my son does not. where did we go wrong or his this just the teenage hormones and friends talking ? so I think as much as I do not want to it’s time to back of and let him eat his words and fail a bit. This is going to be very painful to watch.
Life.. teenagers ..changes it’s enough to make a parent crazy. I know all have been through it and survive but my day we worked for what we wanted we asked for nothing and we got it we where grateful .this generation just seems so arrogant and my Son tries to make it be that it is me …oh no it is not and I am going to show him. wow that was a rant..hahaha okay guess I needed to get that out . Sorry Everyone. Just been a crazy ride on this new journey of being a teenager .Yes have an adult daughter but never went through any of this with her but they are 5yrs apart and so different from one another. Does anyone have any advice to give ? would love some.
It’s a rainy Spring day and it was easy to get things done around the house that really needed to be done then rushing around so I could sit out on the deck in the sun or take a drive and get a coffee …believe not a bad thing but so hard to do house work then. Supper is cooking in the crock pot the delicious smell of chicken cooking fills the house.and dusting is done laundry is going now relaxing and thinking about what a friend going to call her that she is one of my followers on my blog and she has one herself and she gave great advice on my last post. on changes and so I am sitting here and thinking about what she said and making my list. I hope she reads this and knows how i am taking her advice. It’s hard though because the person I was before my kids is a bit different or maybe I just lost who i was and its covered under the surface of being the person i am now and I just have to bring that person back to the surface…does that make since ? if you read my last post you will hopefully understand . So I know one thing hahaha I did get a little bit more serious over the years and uptight more which I think I could let go a bit… and I need to let go of feeling guilty for wanting to have more time for what I enjoy when the only one holding me back is me. I think my kids want that because yes the string needs to be cut a bit . and there the ones cutting it and I am trying to hold on to . So hard this will take sometime maybe baby steps? ….yes that could work. I will get back to you on this.
This Spring season is so different then last year usually the beginning of Spring makes me feel refresh excited to set my decks up with all the outside furniture. ..This year It’s just so unbelievably different I am doing the what I miss thing believe me I do feel very blessed and I am so blessed.. but change is not an easy thing for me and this Spring is what I call a Spring of change . Let’s see I miss my faithful Pups who loved when this season came we got outside on the deck and embraced together the suns warmth and he has now passed over the winter, I write with a tear in my eye. I miss my Son not having his drivers license he is always out and about which he got this winter. So I am always doing the where are you text’s and worries. I miss outings with my daughter now its very rare if we go out and spend time together, since she found new friends this winter .. ughhh so much change this winter that now has made this Spring a very big change to adjust to. I know I have occupied myself around my family for so long which felt like the thing to do when we had started a family and no one told me that this time would come this quick and I now feel I have lost myself I need to find myself again does anyone have any ideas for me ? How to do this? To make anew . To take the bad the difference and make it good. Would love some advice.