Home…

It was ..is a long tired week .. my hubby had a long week , nice but tired . Doesn’t do well away. My son did well ..had graduated from Basic Training and looked very sharp. As my daughter and I who had to stay back her with work and I who cannot fly made it through the 5 days just fine kept busy had some fun laughing .. and yes moments of feeling sad I couldn’t be there to share this moment with my son.so some sleepless ones. as well .. thinking. Happy the 5 days went fast As we waited till 2 in the morning for my son and hubby to arrive back home and seeing my son in his army graduation uniform walk through the door was priceless he looked tired but confident and sharp . With open arms we went to him . It was nice ! Always love his hugs . As straight as my hair is now from the curly ness when he left he was as bald … we both remarked on each other’s head ( hahaha) he said it felt strange being home .he felt like he was still in Missouri .. Finally settling into bed at 4 this morning we woke to the sound of the shower running ..four hrs later . Him so use to being up he was ready to run get some Christmas shopping done . And then yes the gym .. i felt a little set back seeing him kind of get back to his old self or thought this .. I just wanted to hold on to him . it’s 8 at night and I’m ready for bed and he is home and I guess is on Army schedule still he has settled in for a nine o’clock bedtime like he is use to so I had a bit of a chat with him I told him be patient with me I know you need to do what you need to do and I will back off . He said no do not back off you have every right to say these things I need and want and should rest and spend more time home that’s why I am on this block leave and I should of today so I’m sorry . I guess my son has changed a bit and we will see but I will respect his time as well well it’s time for some sleep I’ll be on here more routinely soon.. but for now please be patient with me.

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Snowy Night!

It’s the first snowy night of the season . It started around 7 this evening and now at 11:30 it’s going strong . Everything covered in white . Usually I would be checking the tv every hour for a school cancellation . Instead it’s a new season , new chapter and instead I’m laying in bed with the house all dark and locked up for the night, my daughter is home with Miss Abigail . So quiet as I lay in bed keeping warm while writing a letter by flashlight .. yes a new one for me (hahaha) didn’t want to keep the light on as my hubby is sleeping and yes I could of went into another part of the house but preferred my warm bed. And wanted to write my son a letter while I had things to write about to him. It was actually kind of fun . Yeah doesn’t take much to make me happy . Gave me a feeling of Deja vu when I was younger and knew I should of been sleeping but was writing letters to my friends . And if my mom saw the light on she would tell me to go to bed. Good ol days… didn’t think so back then, but what we learn as we get older.well letter is done and no more worries of wondering about school cancellations. So time to get some sleep and see how much white stuff there is in the morning. Good night!

Good morning!

Good morning everyone hope everyone’s having a good week . I can’t believe it’s Wed already . Been a less running around week then lasts . Last week I felt I needed to keep running around to keep my mind from thinking , wondering. And when that only helped a bit I just gave in and decided …. it’s okay to just stop and if my mind started thinking and wondering fine . Running from it was not going stop it. Things are different .. quieter .. less busy and yes I miss my son so much and it’s fine to feel that . And shed a tear or two or three ..(hahaha) so this week I realize after giving in to my feelings I’ve had a calmer week , I’ve kept busy no chance in that not happening house still needs to be kept up errands still need to be run and suppers still need to be made . But my mind as let me concentrate on reading and coloring . My husband and I are enjoying are shows together and we are joking more learning to be us again . Always have been but now it’s more joking just laughing to our own little things. . My daughter is still at home but has been out with friends and boyfriend and work so haven’t seen her much . I know soon enough my son will be home but I know this experience of his has started a shift in a change of how things will be .around here for all of us.

Quiet house…

It’s Saturday and having this house so quiet is just not right. I am missing the chaos of a active strong will son razzing me , the sound of the back door opening and closing .. even the sound of the blender waking me in the early morning while he made his healthy smoothies. Sadly it’s been only 3 days and it feels like he left weeks ago. Yes can you tell I’m not embracing this new change well? I’m hoping when he can start to call home once a week and we get his address and we can send letters I’ll adjust better. It’s just so hard when I’ve been a stay at home mom and this is what I’ve done for so long take care of my family. The funny thing , well not funny a bit frustrating I think our dryer is gave in and decided to retire ughh … now the funny thing is this would have been a catastrophe on any other day or time but tonight when I realized it and I had to hang the clothes that were not fully dry and know that it could take until Friday to get a new one by the time their open on Monday and then deliver and take away the old one it could be Friday and going to the laundry mat I may then loose it….I think my husband was shocked that I did not loose it when I realize it wasn’t working. I guess there so much more to worry about then this bit of a inconvenience but what can you do . I guess another funny thing I’m yawning .. yes a good thing I will get some sleep then letting everything keep me up worrying .. thinking . I guess it would be a good thing to get off here and get some sleep. Good night everyone.

Friday….

It’s a cold quiet Friday night… except for the occasional cheer my husband yells out towards the TV when our baseball team hits a home run . It’s the playoffs so he’s anxious for our team to win. Miss Abigail is sleeping away how I do not know .. she is upstairs with my husband and I a lot lately … my daughter has been occupied by a friend of hers that broke up with her boyfriend so now every free moment my daughter has when she isn’t working or with her boyfriend she is out. My son took my husband for a hike this morning till mid afternoon so that made my husband happy , now my son is out with friends off and on until tomorrow night to see them while their back from college for the holiday weekend and my son wanting to see them before he ships out for Basic Training Wed . Sunday We will have a family party for him so all the family can come and see him enjoy some food , then Monday and Tues will be him getting ready for leaving. Now I’m starting to get more anxious with him leaving .. ugh I do not want to start this feeling I was doing good . Now I’m thinking and feeling how quiet it will be .. the days shouldn’t be too bad he’s not usually home during the day but the nights he is or has been a bit more lately and knowing he’s not in his room is making me feel anxious .. I keep saying just think he will be fine when I’m sleeping he will be he will have to be, and after two weeks he can call home on Sunday nights . I’m trying to sink this into my head sadly it’s not working. I’m hoping it’s just my mood tonight and tomorrow will seem better with this . I hope .

Reading would be good but I do not know if I could concentrate on it .. I know I should try it’s only 8:30 too early for bed. I know I need to try . I guess I will see if this helps.wish me luck. 😞

Thinking … all good

It’s 11:00 at night lately been sleeping at this time but stayed up to read a bit after chatting with my daughter as we watched some of the tv show The Voice. Now laying here in the darkness with the sound of the fan humming away . .. everyone’s settled in . It’s October already , unbelievable. The trees are starting to change a bit more each day . Some places it’s so beautiful. Over the weekend I went with my son to grab a coffee and then on our way home he took me for a ride on his favorite back roads.. dirt roads ,endless fields of green . Mountains off in the distance and with the foliage amazing and so serene. He loves the back roads like his mom🙂 it was nice being with him calm ,small chats he’s not much of a talker well maybe a bit more with his friends. We just drove along as he pointed out certain things that he liked as we went by certain sites . Time is flying by so it was nice to spend some time with him outside of the house on Friday he will take his dad on a hike my husband took the day off so they would have a day to spend together going on a hike. On Sunday we will have family over to see him . Sat is his day with his friends that will be back for from College being it’s a three day weekend ,to see him and they have several activities planned in just a nweek away and he will be off to Missouri for his Basic Training . He’s ready and I guess I am too well at least as much as a mom is when your child is ready to spread their wings know this is what he wants and I know he is a bit nervous but he’s ready. The holidays are coming and I know it will be different . Quieter … but we will do what we do with the rest of our family and will celebrate when he gets back as well .I will keep myself busy . Along with my hubby and daughters company . Plus I will get a chance to write letters to him which will be a nice change of pace . Love writing letters , with texting and messaging good ol writing with a pen and paper seems like a distant memory. Now I will get some time to do this again . He wants us to , to keep him posted on things going on I know he may not write back as much because in his spare time knowing him he will take advantage of getting some sleep , he says he will write I think one or two letters will come our way but will see . It’s okay if he doesn’t it will be nice for me to enjoy writing letters to him I’m looking at this with a different mind set . Well trying. (Hahaha) and I hope my husband follows. Will see .. I have plenty of books and my blog to do and read. Plus there is some movies my husband and I want to go and see . Also the occasional coffee moments with my daughter and chats. Hopefully some lunch dates too but I know she is busy with work and her boyfriend and friends . I understand that my daughter hasher life to live too . My husband and I will just need to do more activities out. .

Change is never easy but it’s a part of life and I need to embrace it , no fighting it. It’s time to move forward even if it means taking it at baby steps . Speaking of time I guess it’s time to say my prayers and get some sleep it’s getting past midnight . Good night everyone

Good Morning ..yawn

Good Morning .. crazy how Morning comes so quick.. ughh my son and I having such issue with sleep it doesn’t help for myself watching that show my daughter gets into ( read my last post it explains) and of course I did have a dream with the people from it , thankfully not a nightmare. I see my son is sleeping I wonder what time he fell asleep.?

Another day of grey clouds and humidity gave in and turn the air on when I woke . It got so unbearable last night . This weather is as crazy as my son and I’s sleepless nights . Last week it was so humid then the weekend came and it was only in the 50″s which felt so nice. Then Monday it just kept getting warmer and now humid. Mother Nature is in her own nasty pattern. Miss Abigail doesn’t seem to mind she just sleeps the day away. Oh to be a cat. Thankfully the house is pretty clean . Leftovers for supper tonight. One load of laundry going now so easy day and no more episodes of my daughters show she is all caught up (hahah) something pleasant before bed or I will read . I watched because she wanted me to and was upstairs so I said okay and warned her I would probably close my eyes a lot … I did. Well the washing machine is still humming so I guess until it stops I will catch up on The hurricane status . Hope all stay safe that are in her path.