Another long day …yawn

Its been a really cold grey day. Colds and virus are already going around and just feel blah . Just settled an hour ago and did some adult coloring to settle my mind , Im thinking a hot cup of hot chocolate now and start my new book I’ve been anxiously wanting to start but needed to finish the Novel Bittersweet ..must say was not an easy read .. it dragged out a lot each chapter was just boring , sorry love the author but just not this book . So now off to put the kettle on for some hot water . Here is a photo of my page so far that I’ve been working on ,finished a bit more since last posting it.this is probably the shortest post I’ve posted but need to relax.

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Here we go again ..

Never expect the weather to stay the same in New England. Just the day before I open windows to let the fresh air in . This morning as I enjoy my breakfast and holding my hot coffee cup enjoying the warmth of it in my hands because now I’m cold ( hahaha) not complaining just surprised after running the air for weeks to cool the house off . I happen to look at the temps and I can see why it’s cool. The leaves are turning here and there I do not think it will be a vibrant foliage this yr. tell that to the traffic that has backed up in the past weeks to check out this

My daughter is back from the beach she had a good time but said it was nice to be home. We chatted while she did her laundry then she was off out with her boyfriend . My son I have no idea what time he came home last night . After watch the finale of America’s got talent . I read my book it was getting to 11:30 and I knew I need to put it down and get some sleep or I would be up all night.the book has been dragging but now I’m down to the last three chapters and it’s picked up so much I did it want to stop reading. … that was the way Stephen Kings book was . Happy I fell asleep quick once again to wake to seeing my sons car keys on the table and his shoes by the door evidence he was home (hahaha) two weeks left here and he will be in Missouri for Basic Training. Now time is flying. We are so proud of him and he is ready . Waiting ..wondering when he will be home or what he’s doing will be an adjustment . I think I may get more sleep knowing he is on a base not running here and there . It will be quiet my kitchen door will not be opening closing constantly. Yesss I will miss him so much but happy he is doing what he wants.. well time to finish my coffee and start my day .

Landline phone …really!

Today was like any other day lately enjoyed my morning coffee, caught up on the morning news then kitchen clean up after breakfast , laundry. Then something I haven’t done in awhile spent 3hrs on the phone … not the cell phone landline ..house phone (hahaha) this should not feel strange to say or write. I was watching my show and texting a long lost friend that her and I shared the years of parenting together with two out of her three kids that are they same age of my two . My daughter is still good friends with her daughter. We vacationed together went to outings together the girls did endless sleepovers . The past two yrs we have been drifting slowly apart like when the ocean tides drift in then out and back in but for our friendship not coming back in . I can’t really say what drifted us apart ..I guess busyness , life , I don’t know maybe lack of effort on both our parts checking in but lately we have been texting more and trying to figure what happened . Then today we were texting and my soapy was on that we both use to watch together while being on the phone with one another . I got sick of texting so I picked up the landline and called her and we just chatted away talking about our soapy laughing how crazy it was and I believe we manage to talk about 10 different subjects..okay a bit of a exaggeration but wouldn’t be surprised being on the phone for 3 hours. Let’s say it was so therapeutic . Happy I never got rid of our landline. Many households do not have them anymore they just rely on their cell phones. A landline is so much more comfortable to carry around and clearer . What we have become with these cell phones. Her and I from the day being pregnant with our first born spent hours on the phone chatting and all through the yrs . Even spending at time 5 hrs on the phone .Today was nice . I’m hoping we are on the path of being connected again. It was nice to talk about everything but nothing and laugh for hours .

Good Morning ..

Ahh .. I was actually able to get some good sleep last night. Fell asleep around 10:30 , that is really early for me and then I woke around 8 .,So needed. No horror shows before bed (hahaha) during the day did some errands in town and then came home to a quiet house for a quiet afternoon my daughter working my son out with a friend so I decided to take out my adult coloring book and pens and settled on the couch. While watching tv talk about Hurricane Florence, it was nice to color again . At first I wasn’t sure if I could get back into it . It’s hard to explain …. let me see if I can explain . Coloring was something I got into when my sons senior yr began needing an outlet for my mind . Well so much has changed he’s graduated and the summer has been a different one as well as this Fall .My daughter is out more and working more. My son leaves in 3 weeks . So It felt like an old thing I did in the past .. crazy thought , right? Once again it’s hard to explain the feeling. Any ways as I sat here while everything was done that needed to be around the house. I felt like I had scrolled through Instagram Twitter , WordPress enough .Facebook not so much haven’t been as interested in that lately getI tend to get sick of hearing the endless drama . So I pushed forward through my feelings and colored and before I knew it an hour had passed by and my husband came through the door from work looking at me and said well you look content. You know what I was content . My mind was so focus on coloring I didn’t think of things that would otherwise have me doing endless worry over things that were not even a thought to think about. As the night progressed the kids came home , we chatted laughed and then settled into bed I then fell asleep . Did coloring help? Or was it no tv horror shows or cell phone before bed ? Or all of the above ? No brainer all of the above 🙂

Today looks like and feels like another cloudy day need to clean up the kitchen from breakfast so will do that ,pizza night so suppers all set . Sitting here with a late morning coffee and watching the updates on Hurricane Florence . My thoughts and prayers go out to the Carolinas it’s getting devastating .. please keep them in your thoughts.

Thinking….

In 4 weeks it will be my turn as a mom to let go of the strings that has her her child so close since the day he was born . to watch him go off into the world to do what he’s been waiting and working for. I thought I would handle this better then I am guess not. Right now it’s 1 in the afternoon and he is still sleeping I think he may have caught what’s been going around .. he wouldn’t tell me if I asked . Usually this is the only time he sleeps till this time when he’s sick. I have looked in on him but holding back to wake him to see if that’s it. He will say I’m babying him and I know I need to let go a bit but it’s so hard . He leaves in Oct and then comes back the middle of Dec for Christmas but reports back to Basic Training until March. I know he will be fine he chose this and then he will be in the Army National Guards and college if he chooses that path of full time army.

When you have kids no book or person can tell you how fast time flies and how hard it will be to let them go and do what their suppose to do. I know I need to stop focusing on counting down the days and enjoy these 4 weeks and be proud and happy for him.

Changes…

This afternoon while in town I notice how the leaves are changing I kind of feel like those leaves, changing myself …. I see the kids on the playground as I drive home and see them running laughing and it’s beautiful so young and free where did the time go … doesn’t seem like it was that long ago I was sitting on the ground with other parents chatting while all our kids played on the playground when School let out . How we would have to finally tell the kids it was time to head home . So we could settle in for the evening with supper , homework , baths and then a little time for some TV before bed. Now my day pretty much is all mine . After things around the house needs to be done , somethings never change . I’m slowly trying to let go of this strange guilt I hold over myself with all this free time to enjoy my soaps a bit more read a bit more chat with friends all day (hahaha) I do not know why I feel guilty doing nothing a bit more except for what I enjoy . My daughter thinks I’m too hard on myself . That I’ve earned this time since there is really no routine I need to follow anymore. I believe she’s right . I guess I’ve always have had been busy and now no so much until I find somethings to do .

Sunday it is..

The weekend has flown by as fast as last week has … my hubby ‘s vacation week was nice and relaxing, restful ,no routine no time limits just a whatever kind of week. Today will consist of food shopping a chore my hubby and I dislike so much … people are vicious in a grocery store .. some are impatient , rude , it’s food shopping why does it have to be such a production… we get in there we go down our list and do it as fast as possible and has we are walking out we have smiles on our face that it’s done.

Earlier very early this morning my son is waking me to let me know he got invited to go to the beach with friends for the day now I am just coming out of a deep sleep probably the best I had all night since random dreams invaded my sleep pattern….. I really can’t remember them but I know I didn’t have a good sleep because of them . I think just before shutting off the tv and cell phone last night breaking news buzzed in on my phone That Senator John McCain had passed well a surprise but not since we knew he wasn’t doing well but it got my interest to go on to Twitter and yes the news was all over it. What a handsome. Man he was back in the day and hero I read post after post and it teared me up a bit how devoted he was to his country and politics yes I’m sure we all knew this but Im not one to follow the politics like I should it’s too frustrating to me but reading learning about the man and war hero he was was touching. . He gives respect to all our servicemen and the love and passion he showed for our country is worth saying. . My son will be going away soon for Basic Training and that may open a career in the service for him and I am proud of him I respect my son and and his decisions of where this may lead him and all who serve. I feel my dreams had something to do with this . So waking to my son letting me know his plans when he could have just told his father he told me. I guess he told my hubby oh if I tell you and you then tell her she will question where who and when would he be home . She is such a thinker ( hahaha) so I will let her know and answer them ….hmm he was right. Even though I was half a sleep and he was finding this humorous. Oh I will miss this while he is away…

This weekend isn’t only an end to a vacation week but a beginning to a start of a new chapter schools start back up , most of my sons friends have Or will be headed off to college and my son calming down with his running a bit , getting ready himself to leave so onward to this week the end of summer vacation on to Fall and this new chapter.