Woke up to a Very sunny beautiful…but….. A very warm sticky day , so hard to adapt after many chilly rainy days. So I decided not a day to enjoy my coffee on the deck so I ‘watched some news and then got started with my day which consisted to three different stops in town and I would of thought I had a note on my back then said talk to me I ran in to many who wanted to sit and chat about everything so I did my best with the time limit I was on because my son had a track meet and I wanted to go see it. Okay I never pass up a good conversation yes I love to talk:) but time was running out; I stopped to get gas went into pay and the lady who works there decides to tell me and I quote my jerk of a boyfriend has stolen my money all I could was console her with I felt bad but I didn’t know where this was coming from I really do not know her she is just always so nice to me when I go there and I was taken back when she told me that. I wish I could of chatted longer but for one she was working and the lady behind me I felt like she was throwing daggers at the back of my head with her eyes hahaha and I did have a meet to get to . It’s funny my daughter and son are always saying to me do you know that person because a lot of people will strike up a conversation with me I will talk to anyone if your pleasant to me and I usually can spend a good amount of time with them but sadly not today. It’s funny because a lot of people do not know that about me but then I guess they do not give me the chance to get to know me.
The meet went very well my son and his team won and he broke one of his running records in the hurdles so that was a proud moment for my hubby and I . Tomorrow my son will have an all day meet which will be a very long day for him . My hubby will be going I will not be It’s to much walking and standing for this hip of mine but my heart will be there with him. well I think I will call it a day goodnight everyone.
The wind nips at my face as my hair blows around my face blocking my eyes and sending me stumbling to the ground . The earth below me feels hard and cold like your heart. I curse but not because of you but because of me …why I yell how could I be so blind. How could I not see who you where who I was or became so weak…I lay there and the fog surrounds me I try to move but I can’t I can only lay there as the fog gets thicker. My eyes close …I’m awaken by the bright morning Sun.. I blink and I notice I’m in my room I was dreaming and you are gone and I smile I am not weak I am strong.
This is my photo make up day for Monday, laptop was down. So this is a part of my world, this beautiful lake that is one of the hot summer spots . My daughter and I took a ride to it and it was alive with people opening up their lake houses and camps, kids happily riding their bikes adults walking and jogging, just such a happy place even though the lake is not ready for swimmers yet it’s very cold. There is also a beautiful eatery and bar which is called the lake house you can eat and have drinks on the sunny deck as you admire the lake view there’s music , a pool table and yes good food . So ready for the season to begin and enjoy and relax. I hope everyone enjoys .
In my post last night I had mentioned I had a conversation with my son. and I had said it didn’t go as well as planned well I have decided my son is a teenager and definitely does not or is in defiance, does not have a clue about life okay yes he is 16 maybe very social has a lot of drive… focus but maturity not. Okay yes we have all been 16 and we lived in our own worlds and we thought life was so great and fun and we thought we knew everything and our parents we looked at them like they where aliens ….well that was the look I did towards my son. Nothing I said clicked nothing I said was right ,he contradicted himself through out the conversation. I was dumbfounded and knew our talk was going in circles and I didn’t know who was chasing who. I stopped talking just let it go and he went in his room . I pondered the thought over and over in my head the one thing he said that kept slapping me in the face was I qoute “You ask so much of me” “your always telling me to get a better job” it’s always about money I need to concentrate on school and sports ,okay one his father and I only ask for respect when he walks into the house and good grades . and yes we want him to do good with his sports and get into a good college so he can run for them and he is so good at it but its hard to take him after he gets so tired he is exhausting after because he is ugly that I cannot take.who doesn’t want that and we only say things about his job because he his always complaining about money and his father and I feel he wants to hang out with his friends every night and eat out in which case he contradicted himself when he said we do not do that as much now and I only need enough money for gas. yeah okay that’s why when this weeks Spring vacation is here he will be going out and why should we have to pay for that when we pay for everything else and he is able to work. hmm is he thinking of other parents…what is it with these kids and their drama they do not have a clue about life I know my son does not. where did we go wrong or his this just the teenage hormones and friends talking ? so I think as much as I do not want to it’s time to back of and let him eat his words and fail a bit. This is going to be very painful to watch.
Life.. teenagers ..changes it’s enough to make a parent crazy. I know all have been through it and survive but my day we worked for what we wanted we asked for nothing and we got it we where grateful .this generation just seems so arrogant and my Son tries to make it be that it is me …oh no it is not and I am going to show him. wow that was a rant..hahaha okay guess I needed to get that out . Sorry Everyone. Just been a crazy ride on this new journey of being a teenager .Yes have an adult daughter but never went through any of this with her but they are 5yrs apart and so different from one another. Does anyone have any advice to give ? would love some.
Yes …another rainy day. trying not to let this dreary day bring me down. SO now that things around the house have been done and supper will be cooking shortly I have enjoyed an extra cup of coffee with one of my blast in the past TV shows that I found months ago while flipping through channels because watching the news has not been very pleasant, the show is from the 80’s and it had a good running time I do not think a lot of people would remember it My hubby didn’t 🙂 It’s 7Th Heaven its such a great inspirational calm realistic feel good show and I enjoy it so much these days not to many good shows are on good shows. or role models for teenagers anymore well if teenagers even watch TV shows at night because their busy on their phones. well about that will save that subject for another day 🙂 Now back to enjoying things after supper and it’s cleaned up and my family and I are all settled in for the evening I am going to enjoy some Adult coloring ,whoever discovered this for adults is a genius .It takes my mind away for awhile when I want to be free of stressful things and it’s so much fun too .I have always love coloring when I was a little girl and now I can enjoy it as an adult and it helps relieve stress and anxiety . Now that is a good thing. I do love to read but lately I cannot find a book that keeps my interests any idea’s would love some.
This Spring season is so different then last year usually the beginning of Spring makes me feel refresh excited to set my decks up with all the outside furniture. ..This year It’s just so unbelievably different I am doing the what I miss thing believe me I do feel very blessed and I am so blessed.. but change is not an easy thing for me and this Spring is what I call a Spring of change . Let’s see I miss my faithful Pups who loved when this season came we got outside on the deck and embraced together the suns warmth and he has now passed over the winter, I write with a tear in my eye. I miss my Son not having his drivers license he is always out and about which he got this winter. So I am always doing the where are you text’s and worries. I miss outings with my daughter now its very rare if we go out and spend time together, since she found new friends this winter .. ughhh so much change this winter that now has made this Spring a very big change to adjust to. I know I have occupied myself around my family for so long which felt like the thing to do when we had started a family and no one told me that this time would come this quick and I now feel I have lost myself I need to find myself again does anyone have any ideas for me ? How to do this? To make anew . To take the bad the difference and make it good. Would love some advice.
Today I got my subie back and had a nice ride home in it with my daughter we stopped off at Starbucks for a coffee and it was so nice, it’s not very often we get out together lately with her busy with work ..friends ..boyfriend.. in which case it should be. ..but I miss our outing, when we arrived home she grabbed her car and went off with a friend and I sat on our deck absorbing in the warm beautiful sun as I felt the eyes of Miss Abigail the kitty eyeing me at the open window and catching some sun herself.