The things I do ..

It was a lazy start to the Monday. Woke from a dream which I wish I could remember . It must have been something of a sort to have me wanting to remember I guess the feeling I had when I woke was the reason. Grabbed a quick shower and then off to the kitchen for some much needed coffee.. oh my poison.. I only had one cup. Surprised? Don’t be because I knew my daughter and I were heading out to food shop and I knew we would stop for coffee always a given. After food shopping was finished the sun decided to show itself so I was fueled up with caffeine and wanted to be out. So we took a ride. As of today it’s 3 yrs that a child lost her life to a bus accident in our community. 9 yrs old her knapsack strap was caught in the door of the the bus . Negligence of the bus driver who shut the door too soon and not realizing she was trapped as he took drove off to his next stop the rest is self explained😥 this little girl will never be forgotten . She was so precious. I felt it was only fitting to go to the cemetery and think about her visit with her. . My daughter and I have this thing about cemetery’s . We find them peaceful and we use to go a bit more then we do . She went with me today . And we said a prayer for the precious child. My daughter said to me ” I know we do not come here much and I know you like to . I was quiet for a moment. And then started to drive .I stopped at the beautiful fountain that’s sits in the beginning of the entrance guarded by a medal design fence. She looked at me and said ” oh why have we stopped here. I told her this is where I park when I come by myself to find some peace and to collect my thoughts and yes to be by myself , no one would think except for her and a close friend that this is where you could find me if needed. I just love to listen to the fountain bubbling and have some soft music playing quietly in the car . And yes I let my thoughts drift. It’s really a nice feeling . Comforting .. yes I said it and this is a person afraid of death. I guess it’s more about the unknown of it. So yes this is where we sat for a bit and talked . It was nice. And well needed. So have I made you think of me differently now? Some would be a bit standoffish by this. We all have a place where we find comfort. And yes this is mine.

Ocean …peace.

As the sun shines down upon me warming my face the the slight breeze whispers across my cheeks. The sound of The ocean and seagulls call to me as the endless blue of the ocean sits in front of me the sun bouncing off the water sets the scene of a magical sight diamonds sparkling blinding me with its natural beauty. My mind and body are at peace . With every wave that rolls in my thoughts disappear with them as they roll back out taking them farther and farther away from my mind. If only I could take this beautiful sight with me when I go back home .

Love!!

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It’s a new day and a new President elected and    new laws that have passed that I am not to happy about.  I know some of us are happy and some of us are not  happy who is our new President but protesting doing it  violently is not the answer.  I am sorry for that but life will go on and hopefully we can find  some hope that things will change for the good. I do not like to talk about politics because to me it’s just a subject not all will ever agree on. I wish we could of voted for more good  more peace more morals and especially more love  the hate in this world is just  unbelievable I never seen it this bad and it’s so scary. we need to stand together and get stronger  and love more  to get through this world  how can we raise strong happy loving kids if all we show them is the negative’s I just do not believe we can …..I know I am going to try to keep showing my kids that there is good in this world still we just need to try harder and I know there are  other ways to deal with things  we do not agree on by using hate. I hope everyone gets some sleep tonight I know I am hoping to ..  a very late and long night.it was.

 

Too much thinking ??

I feel like I am on a roller coaster emotionally in the path months . In the pat year I have felt content peaceful thought I had life figured out ….was I so wrong I guess we never have life figured out at any age.My life feels off kilt and i just want it back up straight. I want my contentment back. I am doubting everything I thought I did was right I am wishing I could go back and redo somethings because now trying to succeed at something again it maybe to late. so I am kicking myself…is this a midlife crisis? or just everything I believed I was doing was just the wrong way , well not everything just one thing or should say a person .  can you guess ? hahahaha my Son this has been what my last two posts have been about. Great kid  great grades has great friends him and his friends do not party like the other kids at school they hate the fact that kids are wasting themselves on drinking and drugs .their on the running team so they care about their bodies which I am so proud of and their so respectful to people but  great with people  except… us  his parents comes in the house kills him to speak hmm unless he wants something just not easy to love right now hate to say that do not get me wrong his dad and I love him just he makes it so hard. All I hear yup he is a teenager…ugh!!! so sick of hearing those words I m thinking that is not the case .Afraid we spoiled him and now we created ourselves a handful. My daughter was never this way . I was when I was 16 but I knew how far to push it with my parents. just so tired . and do not have any answers anymore. Help need some advice…

politics……

I do not like to talk about politics…..I am not saying who I like never tell anyone who I vote for …it’s my business . I am just appalled by the name calling the constant rude ways the candidates are trying to say they would be the one to be our President, I am not hearing a lot of what they can do to change things for the better…but how this one is this and this one is that …what an example we are setting for the younger generation , so sad it’s like their on a school playground fighting and there is no authority figure to break it up. I think we have had enough of this behavior in this world. name calling back stabbing lying..so sick of it we wonder why this world is so full of anger and bulling people. how does our younger generation have a chance in this world ….come on can we all just grow up…how can you raise good honest kids when the world shows this behavior. I know it’s politics but this is the worst  I have ever seen it. how can anyone choose for the right reason who should run our country.