Thoughts….

The shadows are so dark but so inviting. Why am I so drawn to them? I wait for the darkness to come so the shadows cast a magical glow over the darkening trees and freshly fallen snow. The cold is numbing. My feet making their way through it as the shadows around me grow darker. I know I should turn back but I can’t I need to find the end to these darken shadows a reflection possibly of my thoughts. Why so many why do they tempt me to tread through them? The cold chills my face but there is no turning back. I need answers and I know they’re in the shadows or are they?

Maybe some normalcy now..

It’ brutally cold night, but the stars and the moon are out. And my car is back after my son needed it at his college for a couple of days. Tomorrow I can get out and get some things done and grab myself a coffee. I know like I need more coffee .as the snow had cleared the early morning, the sun cane out shining. Beautiful and bright giving the snow a glittering sight and lifting my spirits a bit. Then as the evening approached, we had a beautiful sunset, and that lifted my spirits even more. I agree with several fellow bloggers on here that winter and the holidays can be a bit of a moment of grieving. I have lost many loved ones and no matter how many yrs pass; it doesn’t change the feeling of loss. Maybe lessens it, but the emotions are still there. Sorry this was suppose to have been an uplifting post . Give me time and this happy laughing lady will be back. Just need to feel these emotions. . So much has changed this past year that I believe it brought more emotions to the surface to be felt. And only tucking them away in the back of my mind is not good. For anyone. So feel because grief has no time limit.

Today I talked with an old friend from High school we have a long history together back in the day; we thought we were each other’s soulmates. Oh, how young we were. The thing is no matter how much we tried to separate, we were connected in a way that had us reaching out to one another ( not in a romantic way), just reaching out to talk when we needed someone to talk to. Sadly we never were able to have a relationship because it was just too intense, and it always ended up in a breakup. He’s married with three daughters. Happily, I cannot say settled, yes. It was nice though to talk and said he was always here if needed. And at the end of our conversation he said call me anytime and remember to smile , keep smiling. So I say to everyone that is in a down mood keep smiling. Here is my beautiful sunset tonight. Enjoy. I know I did.

Snow Day…

After all the wishing, praying sending out good vibes. The snow still came. It was worth the try. Mother Nature dumped 17 inches on us. And I’m sure she heard my cry. I looked out and pulled the blankets over my head. The smell of coffee did not even tempt me to get up and start the day. After about an hour, I knew it was time to face the day. And jump in the shower and grab my big mug of coffee. After only a bowl of oatmeal for dinner the night before ( couldn’t eat ), my stomach growled, so I decided to follow suit with my son and make a spinach omelet. Let’s see the day was a bit of an accident kind of day. I went to make more coffee, and I think because the coffee maker had been on and I added water, it blew up yes literally. And the water was everywhere as I’m.trying to stop the water the pot was on and I was covered in water. I’m shocked I did not get electrocuted, so a new coffee pot it is. I think someone is trying to tell me something😂. Then in the afternoon, I blew a fuse while shutting a light off. Yes, all true. Now I am sitting on the couch cozy with a blanket, Chromebook, books, and a list of movies in my head I will watch in a bit, and if I fall asleep here, so be it. I’m done. Need my alone space. Yes, I’m sulking lol. This vigorous, happy lady is not here at the moment. But she will be back when Mother Nature decides to stop the snow from falling and bring me some sun. Sadly I’m in the wrong state . (Hahaha)

I did get some pictures of before and after, and some will love this snow for you who do. I hope you enjoy them.

It begins..

It’s a quiet Sunday woke late that it was lunchtime, but I was eating breakfast yes when I should have been eating lunch. And I am enjoying my mug of coffee. The ridiculousness of should of. It’s a word I feel. We use at times when we regret. And I do not regret sleeping in or the very late night staying up and watching Hulu. The night is the best time for me. I am trying hard to let go of things. Let go of my overthinking mind that usually, for some reason, seems to escalate more on Sunday. And with this snowstorm coming my mood is fading. I know I should be used to this by now, but like everything in life, things change. I am happy my daughter is safely home from work and now waiting for my son to arrive back as well from work. He has already received the call. He has no school tomorrow. He will head back to school Monday night. Hopefully, the roads will be clear It’s 4 in the afternoon, and I’m on my second mug of coffee, and I’m sure there will be a couple more to follow. Oh, how I dread this snow. I think before my next mug of coffee, I will do a few this gs around the house and move a bit before I find something on Hulu. 🙄

Full moon

  • (Hope you don’t mind the music in the video .. )The moon is full and bright tonight. The light radiating from it has my yard filled with shadows. It’s creepy how the woods look when there’s a full moon. I would doubt the animals are roaming around tonight it’s so cold . I was just talking with a friend tonight on FB who said they were working a 6 to 6 shift tonight making snow at out local ski resort. Soon skiers and snowboarders will be enjoying the slopes. My son loves to snowboard . Did so much of it throughout his elementary and high school yrs . Then the first yr after graduating . Now I think he will be too busy to enjoy. I use to love going and watching him when he was younger flying down the slopes . Yes at time I closed my eyes . ( hahaha) we did have a moment of some snow flakes but then the sun came out nice and bright. Not that I minded. I was even shocked that I enjoyed the cold . I actually found it refreshing. People have laughed at this when I told them this. Just trying to stay positive about it . I need to I dread winter. I’m a fire sign I need the sun. No sun is not good. My friend keeps telling me to go to a tanning salon and It would make me happy . I’m not sure if I dare. I’ve heard so many different things on this .
  • It’s midnight and at the moment I’m wide awake. I’m watching Long Island Medium . My friend thinks I should go onto her website and try to see her. I don’t know . I love Theresa I’m just afraid what she may come up with. I feel deeply . So it scares me a bit. Before my mom had passed she asked for me . I was home taking care of my newborn. She told my sisters who were with her she needed to talk to me then she passed. This has had me wondering for yrs. maybe it was nothing… but what if it was something ..do I want to know or will it just cause me anguish? Once you open that door it will be hard to close. Oh how we wonder. Well time to think of getting some sleep. Goodnight everyone.

Saturday ride…country living.

It’s a balmy 47 degree day (hahaha) hubby and I went to the dump and then decided to get a coffee treat… calling it a treat because we usually just get a hot flavored coffee but we saw this banana split flavor frozen coffee and had to try . Okay this will defiantly be the only one unless they keep this for a bit because it would have to be a monthly treat … it was so filling .

We didn’t feel like going home just yet so decided to take a ride. My hubby loves back country roads so off we went . The coffee cold but inside the truck nice and warm as it spit snow on to the windshield. We went by a farm to see that sheep were out enjoying the sun . Saw the little lambs walking along with the older ones . Love listening to them such a beautiful sound of Spring .

We let them be and proceeded on with our ride. Defiantly country roads….

The grass is looking nice and green now . As you see the clouds moving in where the clouds that gave us some snow flakes. Thankfully nothing much but just proves how cold it is. Now home the house is nice and toasty . Everyone’s working so just hubby and I and Miss Abigail . The sun is out again the clouds have cleared a bit and shining so it’s shining in Nice and bright. Soon will be time to make some supper . Thinking Manwhich (sloppy Joes) and potato tots . Simple and filling. And some will be left for whoever of my kids will wants some when they get home from work. 🙂