Monday!

it’s Monday a fresh new week to get back into a routine ,a full week of school, sports meet warmer temps no big storms insight sadly my daughter is still out of work due to illness but hoping she feels some improvement when she wakes up. Laundry is going beds are made kitchen is cleaned up after breakfast . I am now sitting down catching up on the morning news and enjoying a cup of coffee ahhh so nice. I’ve started the book I posted and started a new coloring page over the weekend which kept me busy and warm

. I am going to pat myself on the back , if you read my last post I wrote how my son was out with his girlfriend and I was NOT going to text him to have him check in. or worry and I didn’t well I didn’t text. I wouldn’t say I worried but hoped he drove slow and careful on his way home. I got into the Golden Globes with my hubby and didn’t realize my son had texted me ….it wasn’t that long until I noticed but it hopefully showed him was waiting with my phone in hand . He texted “on my way home. ” I do not know who was more surprised 🙂him for checking his phone and seeing no text from me or I seeing his text .. before I knew it he was walking in the door he talked a little bit and I tried not to do the twenty questions just how was Mary ? Did you have a good time? And after that he said goodnight and was off to bed. Now to keep this going oh am I trying….so hard when I’ve been by their side from day one through their first cut to their first everything to their first letting goesI can’t tell you what is the hardest part their first cut or letting go ….maybe letting go because it’s i that is now hurting not with them but just I because this is what I’ve known for so long .. my daughter is so different we have always been close and we are friends as well . With my son it just feels so different. I know boys let go differently then girls but this is ……different 😥 no hand book in the world could of warned me how this would feel. I’m am trying and I will keep doing this. Everyone tells me go out with friends do things with your husband I am but we are not big go to the movies we like watching them when they come out and we can cozy up at home and watch them . We have always been homebodies .. before kids we out dinking and dancing on the weekends but now that doesn’t hold an interest . We have spent nights out at relatives and enjoyed some drinks food laughs more that has been nice just need more idea s but for now it’s Home Movies going out for coffee dinner I guess we are heading in the right direction .. but it just feels different .

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Rainy day … Thinking

It’s a rainy Spring day and it was easy to get things done around the house that really needed to be done then rushing around so I could sit out on the deck in the sun or take a drive and get a coffee …believe not a bad thing but so hard to do house work then. Supper is cooking in the crock pot the delicious smell of chicken cooking fills the house.and dusting is done laundry is going now relaxing and thinking about what a friend going to call her that she is one of my followers on my blog and she has one herself and she gave great advice on my last post. on changes and so I am sitting here and thinking about what she said and making my list. I hope she reads this and knows how i am taking her advice. It’s hard though because the person I was before my kids is a bit different or maybe I just lost who i was and its covered under the surface of being the person i am now and I just have to bring that person back to the surface…does that make since ? if you read my last post you will hopefully understand . So I know one thing hahaha I did get a little bit more serious over the years and uptight more which I think I could let go a bit… and I need to let go of feeling guilty for wanting to have more time for what I enjoy when the only one holding me back is me. I think my  kids want that because yes the string needs to be cut a bit . and there the ones cutting it and I am trying to hold on to . So hard this will take sometime maybe baby steps?  ….yes that could work. I  will get back to you on this.