Saturday night my daughter and I settled on the couch and enjoyed the movie The Notebook . We have seen it “hundred times ” but it just never gets old. Yes we laughed and we cried but that’s what happen with good movies. 2 hours went by quickly and it was midnight when we looked up from the TV . My daughter sighed as she yawned . Tiredly telling me how she enjoyed watching it once again. Moments later she headed down to her place and I stayed there cozy wrapped in my blanket in the darkness … yes thinking , thinking about the movie the meaning of it . Yes like I stated seen it ” a hundred times but I’m always amazed how every time I watch it I find something new that jumps out at me . And it sets more meaning to me . As I sat there pondering . I decided I wanted to watch it again .. crazy? (Hahaha ) no I just wasn’t tired and ready to move from my cozy spot. And I thought it would be nice to just watch alone . This movie has so many emotions in it . And yes I feel everyone one of them to my core . I cozied more into my blanket and before I knew it it was over . And my eyes were moist from the tears that once again built up in them. It’s kind of a silly thing when watching a movie that can make you so sad also makes you feel good. And you would shed those tears a”100 times over” to feel those emotions again.
What is it about thinkers ? Our minds are either calm or racing with thoughts so deep you feel them through your body right into your soul. The thoughts run endlessly through our minds . Words spoken from someone whether there meant to to teach us a lesson or just said we can take them to the extreme and feel it in so many ways . We can replay them over and over in our minds trying to explain to ourselves what it means. Breaking the words into tiny little pieces and then like a puzzle putting them back together again to understand. Oh the mind of a thinker is so exhausting. When someone hurts we think about it and tend to feel hurt with them . Along with thinkers I believe we tend to feel more emotions then others and at times it’s draining . Sadly I love very deeply and once I love there is no end to it. so these qualities are hard to handle at times ..Sometimes it feels like so much weight on your shoulders but honestly it’s in your head. This weight we carry. I try and I try but my thoughts are endless as the ocean and no stopping the endless waves that come crashing in.
Get up smile , face the day with some good thoughts . Let nothing sadden you , let the thoughts in your head that are begging you to let in all the negative thoughts push them away . Be strong, laugh let the day be yours . Fill it with all the things you enjoy . Take a drive turn up the radio sing to your favorite songs. Or just sit outside and let the sun shine on your face . But just keep smiling. Be kind to others even if they are not kind to you because you may teach them how to be nice .. or maybe not but you will be happier for it .I know I never want to be a grumpy older person I know we never know what someone is going through . I’m just stating I do not let age get the better of me. . I want to always be able to laugh . Let my heart feel joy not sorrow. Yes there will always be some bad days but only for a moment. Keep moving forward . You will be happier in the end the reward is amazing. It’s a happier you.
I wake or I believe I’m awake. Darkness surrounds me. I feel like a child playing hide n seek and I’m grabbing and reaching for walls to guide me through this darkness. It’s so quiet everything is calm too calm. But in my head I’m hearing a faint scream. Is it me? I yell out are you there where are you . But no one answers back. Then I recognize the voice of the scream I hear it’s mine. Why oh why is it so dark why is no one there I begin to yell out again but then I’m awaken the sun is bright blinding .. I’m awake.
The thoughts run endlessly through my mind. I try to calm them . But it seems like an endless battle. The thoughts of so many emotions. Fear, happy sad lost. Why ? Sometimes our mind is our worse enemy as the saying goes. I try to to calm it I focus on my breathing . I think of my happy place where I’m running endlessly through the field of endless beautiful green soft grass under my feet . Daisy’s all around me the sight is beautiful . My mind calms ..the thoughts slowly fade I stay focus on this beautiful sight . Until no thoughts cloud my mind. A feeling of calmness takes over and my mind is for now at peace.
I sit and I think, oh how I think , the mind is a mysteries thing. I can think of so many things do they matter , do they need to ? Oh why then does my mind wander to the past . The future, to the present then all over again back through all of them … and yet as I think there is no emotion I feel . It’s just blank just an endless blank of emotions….