Night time upon us and the chill in the air sends shock waves through my already tired cold body. The sky is as dark as can be the star’s are tucked away in the cloudy sky. Even the woods seem quiet tonight, no scurrying of wild life to be heard. Just a sound of a far away car motor or a whistle of train going by to shake the web’s from your tired mind.. Mother Nature why do you seem upset tonight ?sending this chill our way. Please bring your warmth back please be happy again.
The rain comes pouring down making the night darker then its already is. I shelter my chilled body under the comforts of my blankets waiting for the storm to pass.My thoughts are at bay for now letting my mind feel free to occupy the many blessing I have So I close my eyes and dream of all the goodness around me . Thank you lord.
Darkness surrounds me thoughts invade me . Eyes are tired but body is restless. Time to stop thinking time to stop wondering time to let the quietness calm me and let myself drift like the waves in the ocean but gently into a sleep of dreams ….
I am a happy nice and given person but hurt me or my family you will feel my wrath .
I am strong , stubborn person but can have my moments of weakness in most cases you will not see unless I let you. .. do not underestimate me I can put up a good fight for what I believe in.
I am religious I believe.. I pray but I it’s private and personal for me.
I love to socialize I a can talk to anyone and everyone but my circle is small ..In the past I’ve let in to many and learned so small fits me well.
I live for today and blessed for every new day. I have loved many and lost many too.
I love deeply and hurt easily.
I am simple and live simple I do not ask for much . Drama is not in my vocab.
I only ask or want for happiness and good health for myself and family.
I am ME .
Why do I write? I believe it’s like a runner who loves to run it’s a need a drive . It’s something that your body craves when it discovers it just like how someones mind craves to write words down on paper that the mind wants to express,. and likes the feeling of freedom it gives them . Runners run to also relieve stress and clears their mind, same as it does for a writer . Now the question is WHY do I write? well all that I have stated but it’s more then that I have been writing since I was a teenager I can’t count the amount of Journals I have had and then the endless amount of poems I’ve written thoughts that are in my head. When your a teenager my favorite place to take a notebook and pen and write was an old abandon covered bridge, listening to the walls of the old wood creak as the wind would blow through those warn down walls and the beautiful sound of the the stream was a perfect place. I love the satisfaction of it .After I started a family I got busy with them and writing went to the side a bit. Off and on if I had a moment I would write but not as much as I wanted . I have chronic hip issues and I cannot run to relieve my stress so writing helps a lot and now with my kids growing up my daughter an adult now and my son a teenager and another yr to graduate High school I have the time now and do I need this more then ever.
I started this blog about a yr ago and it’s about my life with my family everyday life going on’s the stresses of having kids teenagers writing about my other interests .To some who read this will probably get board and just pass by it and to some may like it for them thank you. believe me I am not writing this blog for a ton of views yes it would be nice it feels good when I see the likes but my simple little issues are not for everyone and I know that, but at times it does hurt when I do not get a like and I doubt myself and I question everything I wrote…yes my grammar is not up to date. the writing structure needs to be worked on but sadly I just get on here and just write what come out of my thoughts and really do not thing about it. but I do know I love all my followers and appreciate them and me and read my post. I try to as well. So once again a big THANK YOU!
This is where I enjoy my first morning cup of coffee looking out this window ..and everything always looks the same but it’s not ,life changes in a blink of an eye everything feels so different. My kids have grown up my life has come less chaotic and quieter well some times if my son and his friends are here:) My loving little buddy my pups has gone over the Rainbow bridge no more by my side but forever in my heart he will be.. but I miss him so much .I know it’s only been two weeks but the heartbreak is still so fresh and that leaves me one less needed and busy. So as I sit here looking out I reflect on this past year, it’s been a sad and crazy one for a lot of people the world is getting a lot less safer the violence is so unbearable the attacks around the world.. to people just less kinder to nasty tragedies in our little Town . I know .. life is constantly changing just the way of life but some of the the changes are not positive no matter how positive we try to be….. some days does anyone wish it would slow down just a bit so we can catch up and breath and try to find a silver lining some where in all of this chaos? I do . So I sit here with my coffee and enjoy the sunrise shining in and know that I have this to look forward too and wish for better things in this world .
Every day is a new day …but I feel like I did yesterday.
I shed quiet tears for I am not ready to let you go. but I must , I keep moving forward
but it’s bittersweet. I find myself laughing then a memory nips me in the face like a cold windy day. I haven’t forgotten you don’t you know ….
your in my heart where you will be always.. . let me smile let me laugh for it’s too hard to carry this pain.