Night Noises…

Good Morning ! As I stated last night that I was watching a fireworks special in our living room while my son was out and my hubby and daughter went to bed early ..for a early work morning . So I got comfy in my chair , water, tv remote and book next to me . The holiday special ended and next thing that came on was Shrek hmm.. okay it’s a good animated movie but was not feeling it (hahaha) so the tv went off and I grabbed my book . As I’m reading I kept hearing this noise , couldn’t really make out what kind of noise just something I hadn’t heard before. .. all I know it seemed like it was coming from outside my window that over looks the deck we love to sit out on. I sat in my chair thinking what is it then it stopped . I was happy because I really didn’t want to have to go outside and check .. never know what animal it may be.if you look keep reading you will see the evidence it left .. ughh Raccoon is our guess. There is sunflowers growing there and as you can see it’s close to the window where I was sitting inside . I’m happy I didn’t go out . one it may have just ran away or it would of hissed at me and I have been hissed at by a raccoon it’s scary ๐Ÿ˜‚and sadly this was too close for comfort to sho away. hahaha) we really love having the sunflowers grow on the deck and never had a problem with raccoons getting this close ,we are trying to figure out how to keep them away . I know probably should just remove the planter . Nature may win again . It’s doing a good job of keeping us off our decks .. I’m thinking it will be another night doing some inside reading. Can’t say I do not have enough books to keep me occupied while everyone else sleeps. Will see if the raccoon comes back back tonight. One more chance before moving planters.

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Settling .. thinking stop thinking, ..

Today time seemed to move in slow motion. I went around cleaning up things around the house ,dusting, the usual .Figuring what to make for supper . .. knowing I had time because my hubby had texted to say he was working late. I watched my day time soap and then as I was waiting for the washing machine to finish I sat outside on my swing closing my eyes trying to stop thinking .. reflecting back to what my daughter had told me earlier in the day.. ( read my post before this) couldn’t imagine how that family was coping with this loss … I looked up at the blue sky and thought how beautiful it was and the same word echoed in my mind…..why? Does God know why ? Does he understand ?

I worry about this I must admit because I have a daughter that suffers from such anxiety since high school she is doing much better now , has her moments but gets through . She is so sensitive which I believe is what makes me so nervous .. I know when she hears about suicide it breaks her heart . She has such a big heart . After sitting outside for a bit I knew it was not doing me any good because I just sat there swinging back and forth which usually I love but I was thinking thinking to much . I got up and made myself busy until finally the washing machine was done.. About 2hrs later my daughter walked into the house alone I looked around for her boyfriend she was with earlier … no where to be found . She stated he would be here soon was with his family getting a car from them and I just wanted to come home and wait for him . I didn’t push , I watched as she went down to her place and came back with her book in hand and settled on the couch as she asked what I was doing … I stated not much sat in the living room with her with my book . I knew she was needing some quiet time but also wanted to talk but not , always when she grabs a book. she then said said I think everyone is at the beach I was like what ? she said on Facebook everyone for the most part is saying their at the beach ..going to the beach …you will see this all summer posted on there . I told her yeah I’m sure. Do you want to be ? she said no not at all just wonder why it has to be plastered all over Facebook . I thought to myself that’s what happens on there . People need to state where they are . I rolled my eyes to myself . I just replied well then stay off Facebook . Take a break from it. She sighed .

Sometimes I believe life is only exciting for some if they state all their where about’s and play how happy they are to the world … but are they? . Or just need to brag or just like to state where they are . I do understand my daughters point. I grew up without it and I think life was easier . We lived our life’s did what we wanted and no one had to really know. I think that’s why getting back into reading again and doing projects . Plus waiting for my journal I want to start and so believe it’s a perfect time .not going to say anymore until I receive it. I believe will be a great blessing. ๐Ÿ™‚ Tonight I settled in and watched my hubby and i’s favorite summer show . America’s got Talent. Now he is snoring away and I was trying to read but my eyes started to get heavy . My son is settled in for the night my daughters with her boyfriend so I think I will say my prayers and get some sleep .. hopefully I can finish saying them before I find myself falling asleep., yes my prayers are long.. โค๏ธ

Life..

It’s morning the sun is shining the skies are a crystal blue ,it’s a bit less humid. I sit and drink my coffee with a heavy heart .. my daughter had told me about a young man who was a classmate of a friend of hers from work , her friend heard I believe over the weekend that his classmate had taken his life .. 22yrs old .. it’s just so heartbreaking .. too many are taking their life. I do not know of the details if he suffered from depression I just know when I look at his obituary picture there’s this young man in his Army photo and he his smiling like he’s on top of the world . It states his accomplishments track star in high school class president i t states that he was very smart he made lieutenant and I believe graduated from college . I believe it states what activities he enjoyed . ,,, But what my daughter pointed out it doesn’t state how he was loved by his friends or that he did anything with friends or how he will be missed by his friends yes it states that he will be missed by his family . Hmm I don’t know .. but what jumps out at me is it seemed he was alone … yes I know Army , college, great athlete career , but still no matter what you succeed this world can be lonely.. it’s hard to imagine why .. but when it’s happens and it’s seems more often these days the answer is why? Sadly we do not know everything that goes on in someone’s head no matter how well we know them. I just pray that God holds him and his family close who are suffering from his loss . Their son. … brother. I wish people can know how precious life is I know it’s hard there’s bumps in the road of life but I hope if anyone who is feeling alone ..sad Please talk to someone . Life is so worth living it can be beautiful , it’s a gift I’m not a Dr. or a Psychologist … just a mom who”s heartbreaks every time this happens.๐Ÿ˜ฅ

Learning..

No matter how old we get ,we are always learning . I must say I’m finding that even though my Son has graduated ..the drama with my sons friends parents…not all but most still can’t let go of the drama. I could blame social media but I can’t say it’s to blame … I have met some wonderful people and am happy to call them friends it’s just what you choose to do ,for instance Facebook I have many family members from out of State many local friends and many from a afar from other parts of the world that I love to connect with on Facebook , there’s just a few (locally ) that are a thorn in my side and make me want to shut my account down , these few act like we are still dealing with high school kids and have to get involved okay become nosey and start trouble … my son and I have always had a complicated relationship he never liked me to be that mom who was involved in every school activity , or his friends this was his world and I’m his mom not his friend now we get along much better since his graduation, do we have our moments oh yeah but we are both learning , but a few are so in their kids business it’s horrible , when I get on fb just to catch up with people I enjoy ,this one lady just has 20 questions of course about my son my life what she has what she’s doing what she’s getting I want to write in all upper case I DO NOT CARE! I know karma will bite me… but come on I do not need this . But I am learning , and letting it be okay to ignore change the subject when I get a message from her . So many people have said well just get off of Facebook , no I do not believe that is the answer well not for me. I’m learning just how I want to use it . If that was the case then I would drop every social media site … I love my Twitter all my soap fans are on there and we chat about our soap.I love my instagram because I can share special moment in pictures on it and see other parts of the world with my distant friends. I love my blogging because I can share my feeling my life and I have met some wonderful people that I also would like to call friends. So yes I’m learning how to now be on these sites with no more high school track pics .. no more coffee pics since I do not buy coffee out anymore. ๐Ÿ˜ฅ yes a learning experience and new chapter begin and please no drama๐Ÿ™‚

Thinking too much…

It’s a beautiful day the sun is shining the temps are just right. House is clean suppers set but why… can’t I stop my mind from thinking about everything …. so much coming up it’s over whelming me and my thoughts just go to the worry mode why… what happened to my saying , take it one day at a time . One thing at a time should add to my motto list. I’m not taking my own advice too well.. ughh so frustrating . Why am I so afraid that things will work out think positive… why . I guess this is why everything is done in this house today earlier then usual racing around trying to ignore my thoughts. I know over thinking worry does not change anything. It will be what will be . I just pray that God can wash these thoughts away ..

Mornings…

woke to a thunking sound and I just laid in bed trying to ignore it haha my daughter who was up early getting ready for work came in to my bedroom to tell me that the bluebird was back again hitting against our living room window and clinging to the screen ….yes again over the weekend it was doing this and it was so creepy it wouldn’t stop .Miss Abigail was going crazy jumping in the window and making cat noises it finally stopped and went away when I pounded on the window . There is a bird house below the deck railing so it could have babies in it she’s protecting …..I hope hahaha you can see it in the photo peeping in as well as the crazy squirrel that has been hanging from the feeder since I finally rolled out of bed and dragged myself to the kitchen for coffee. Their it was just hanging there . Crazy morning out my window . The bird is gone once again but Miss Abigail is still unsettled she is hiding . Well my coffee is finished and now time to get some things done around the house. I hope everyone has a great day .

Good Afternoon..

It’s Tuesday but feels like a Monday hmmm ..always feels that way when Monday ends up being a holiday. It sometimes tends to throw the whole week off. It’s April vacation if that means anything to me hahaha my son is still not around but doing good things, helping a family member with some outside cleanup then to the gym and his track practice . So busy. A good busy . My hubby and daughter are back to work . I doing my usual cleaning up the house a bit.. prepping supper and now settled for a bit watching my daytime soap soon . Then out the door to run some errands . One thing at a time ๐Ÿ™‚

What is with this new generation… oh my gosh the drama is beyond the normal If drama is normal… my daughter too busy taking care of her friends that are causing their own stupidity sadly yes it’s stupidity things…. and my daughter feels she needs to help them okay their in their 20’s their adults yes but they really need to get a grip and yes parents need to help them at this point friends are not doing it…and my daughter needs to take care of herself and get her things together. So crazy. Where did we go wrong?these kids do not want to grow up.so frustrating and I just shake my head because no matter what I say she isn’t going to take the advice well she will take it but follow it hmmm no I do not believe so . ๐Ÿ™„well time for my show then after errands to run . have a great day evening , what ever time a day it is in your part of the world.